John 18:33-37
Embracing the Truth
James Sledge November
22, 2015 (Christ the King)
“What is truth?” That is
Pilate’s response when Jesus says, “For this I was born, and for this I came
into the world, to testify to the truth. Everyone who belongs to the truth
listens to my voice." And so Pilate cuts off Jesus’ attempt to
engage Pilate the man, the person behind the persona.
On
the surface, Pilate is the most powerful man in all of Jerusalem, in all of
Palestine. He is Roman governor, with the power and authority of the Roman
Empire and the might of the Roman army at his disposal. He has the power of
life and death over Jesus and countless others. Yet the gospel of John
describes a scene where Pilate is the one on trial, where he is a pawn caught
up in events he cannot control.
In
John’s account of Pilate’s trial before Jesus, Pilate is a tragic, even comic
figure. Amidst all his trappings of power, he must scurry back and forth
between Jesus and the Jewish authorities gathered outside, and as the events
unfold, Pilate grows more and more frightened, and more and more aware that he
is trapped. So much for all that power.
In
the portion of this trial that we hear this morning, Jesus responds to Pilate’s
questions with questions of his own, or answers that reshape the conversation.
In a manner reminiscent of his conversations with Nicodemus or a Samaritan
women at a well, Jesus invites Pilate to see things differently. Even at his
own trial, Jesus reaches out and ministers to Pilate, offering him a chance to
let go of assumptions and patterns that trap him, to grow and step into the
truth. But it is more than Pilate can do. It would be far too costly for him.
I
think most any modern politician can appreciate Pilate’s predicament. Think of
all the ways politicians and office holders find themselves boxed in, unable to
speak what they truly believe or think. Are all those increasingly absurd
statements about Syrian refugees and Muslims really heartfelt, well-reasoned
responses? Or do the people making them feel forced to speak a certain way, trapped
just like Pilate.
People
regularly trash politicians for dancing around the truth, for the way they
“spin” and massage the truth, but there is often a price for them to pay if
they don’t. Democrat or Republican, conservative or liberal, most all discover
that their notions of power and control are as much illusions as was Pilate’s.
There are things they must say and do, and things they cannot.
But
I need not pick on politicians. Fact is, most of us live behind masks and
personas. Perhaps not so blatant as Pilate’s or some politicians, but there are
plenty of times when I am frightened of the truth, when I’m not inclined to let
Jesus draw me out of my fears.
As a pastor, I am supposed to know and
embody certain things. There are certain assumptions about who I am and how I
should act. Some of those are my own assumptions that I have acquired from God
knows where, and some are assumptions that others have for me. Much like
Pilate, I can find myself caught in these assumptions and expectations without
much thought for truth.
Today,
on Christ the King Sunday, we who are Christian proclaim that Christ alone rules
our lives. Every loyalty and every allegiance is secondary to following Jesus. Or
so we say.
Being
a Presbyterian pastor provides me with a decent salary and with health care and
with a pension. I dare not endanger those. Being pastor of a thriving
congregation with lots of successful programs presumes that I am a savvy,
skilled leader who can help those programs thrive even more. I dare not let on
that I’m not sure what I’m doing. In any congregation some people are bound to
think the pastor has got faith and prayer and spirituality figured out. I dare
not be too open about my own faith struggles, about those times when I long for
God’s voice, for a tiny breath of the Spirit, but sense nothing.
When
I first became pastor of this congregation, I worried that I had made a
mistake. I was not comfortable in the DC culture. I worried that I was a bad
fit for this church, and I missed my former congregation terribly. I dared not
speak this out loud, but the truth has its way. My attempts to project strength
and certainty, to conceal my fears, left me acting as foolishly as Pilate, and
no doubt poisoned a number of encounters with some of you. Like Pilate, I was trapped
by my expectations and fears. Jesus surely invited me to step into the truth on
a number of occasions, but I must have had my own way of dismissing him, my own
version of, “What is truth?”
Surely
it is not just me. Surely it is not just pastors and politicians. Parent or
child, student or teacher, employee or employer, we all find ourselves caught
up in assumptions and expectations. We all get trapped by fears and worries and
anxieties. And to varying degrees, we all labor under illusions of power and
control. As he does with Pilate, Jesus says to us, “Where did you get all this?
Wouldn’t you prefer the truth? Won’t you let me help you?
Ah,
but the truth can be scary. It sometimes tells us that we’re on the wrong
track. It sometimes tells us that we value the wrong things. It sometimes tells
us that our politics, our theology, our notion of church and faith, or the
things we’re convinced will make us happy, are way off base. Just as Jesus was
to his own religious institution and to Pilate, the truth can be frightening.
Yet Jesus insists, “For this I was born, and for this I came into the world, to testify to
the truth. Everyone who belongs to the truth listens to my voice.”
Jesus’ invitation to walk in the truth,
to listen to his voice, is an invitation born of God’s love and grace. But
Jesus says lots of things that frighten me. He questions my focus on money and
things. He is forever hanging out with unimpressive people from the margins,
people who don’t belong in polite
society, would wouldn’t really fit in at most respectable, church congregations.
He asks me to risk my own well-being for the sake of such folks. He even tells
me to love the people I most fear, my enemies.
But I want to be impressive and
upstanding and respectable. I want to be successful and comfortable. I want to
be in control. Maybe I should keep Jesus at arm’s length. Maybe I should
continue hiding behind a mask.
____________________________________________________________________________
Funny
thing is, our masks rarely fool people for long. People have a dim view of
politicians because it’s so obvious that many are trapped and unable to speak
freely, to speak the truth. The harder I try to show that I’m the religious
expert with all the answers who knows just what we should do, the more obvious
my foibles become. And very often, when churches engage in hypocrisy, everyone
can see it, except, possibly, those churches.
And our masks can’t possibly fool God. We may
imagine that dressing up, acting all respectable, doing the right kind of
music, he right sort of worship, and having an enlightened understanding of the
Bible makes us impressive, makes God think well of us, means we’ve got a handle
on things, but that’s fooling ourselves just like Pilate did.
Another
funny thing; as much as I want to think I’m in control, as much as I want to be
in charge of my own life, those times when I’ve felt most free and most at
peace were when I quite pretending and let Jesus be in charge. Yes, Jesus does
lead me into some scary places, but turns out he knows where he’s going a lot
better than I do.
And
the king said, “Everyone who belongs to the truth listens to my voice.” I’m
trying, Jesus. I’m trying.
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